Sons and fathers

Raymond, one of the oldest business house in the country is fighting a family battle

One of the oldest business families in the country is battling a familiar battle, a father raging against the injustices of his son, while the son rails against his father for abuse of authority. Vijaypat Singhania has said that handing over the reins of Raymond to his son, Gautam Hari Singhania, was the “biggest mistake”. And the son has in turn accused the father of manipulating the media.  

This is not the only father-son duel that is playing out in public, nor is it as many have declared, a modern-day malaise; the troubled relationship between a patriarch and his children has powered mythical narratives across the world since the beginning of time. 

Such conflicts have been the underlying theme in Vedic myths — Shiva’s beheading of Ganesha is a case in point. The Greeks have their version in Oedipus and King Laius, where the hero ends up killing his father and marrying his mother. In Persia, the legend of Sohrab and Rustom opens up another window into the strife-ridden bond where the son is killed by the father. 

In these myths and legends death is the ultimate resolution of the conflict. This is because in patriarchal societies, the father was often seen as the child’s first enemy. Joseph Campbell (The Power of Myth) believes that this is the primary metaphor that many myths are structured around. Even modern-day myths, be it the Star Wars movies, the superhero comic books and movies borrow the same template.

Conflict gives way to a more congenial relationship over time as antagonism is replaced with obedience and subservience. The story of Bheeshma giving up all rights over his inheritance for his father’s happiness in the Mahabharata is one example, as is the Rama’s deference to Dasaratha in the Ramayana. According to scholars, this is a natural outcome of societies maturing and, on a more practical note, a more organised approach towards property and inheritance. 

It could also be a way of ordering the chaotic nature of the relationship. It became necessary to temper the instinct to fight one’s opponent to death with a more nuanced understanding of family, friendship and tribal loyalties. And thus, even in Greek societies — as depicted in the Iliad and the Odyssey — where strong and courageous men were in great demand, father and son were aligned to a common tribe or cause to ensure that they fought on the same side. 

ON A WING AND A PRAYER: Orazio Riminaldi’s 1625 painting of Daedalus with his son Icarus.

Consider the relationship between Priam and Hector and Odysseus and Telemachus in the Iliad and the Odyssey, respectively, where the bond is emotional and one of deep affection. However, the ties that bind the two sets of father and son are nurtured in absentia; either the parent is away at war as Odysseus is in the case of Telemachus, or has retired from his role as patriarch like Priam and Hector. Perhaps that was the only way two power structures could negotiate peace in a society that placed the male at the top of the pyramid.

In most mythologies, father and son do not share unconditional love nor are they prone to public displays of affection. The son has to prove his mettle by fighting his own battles, only then does he earn his father’s respect. There are exceptions however. Dhritarashtra’s love for Duryodhana, for example, is blind, but the story is also used as a warning against excessive paternal indulgence, as is the one about sun god Helios and his son Phaeton.

The fathers and son saga ends tragically in myth. Be it the unwitting murder of one by the other or the inability to protect one from misfortune, there is always a hint of the unfulfilled and unrealised in the relationship. The story of Daedalus and Icarus is particularly poignant. Daedalus was a master craftsman. Imprisoned by the king of Crete, Daedalus plotted an escape for himself and his son Icarus. He built a set of wings that would help them fly to safety and while strapping them on to his son’s back, instructed him carefully about the path to be taken. But despite his warnings and tutelage, Icarus flew too close to the sun melting the wax in the wings and crashed to his death. A grief stricken Daedalus never recovered from the tragedy. 

Myths, Campbell said, ask one to go inward and read the message hidden in its symbolism. It may be a good start for all families currently embroiled in bitter father-son conflicts to heed his words and start reading their myths right.