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Woo are you looking for?

The author tries out a new dating app and comes out twice shy

Ashish Sharma
Last Updated : Jul 25 2015 | 12:03 AM IST
I sucked at Tinder. Few women responded to my messages. Even fewer sent me messages first. The only girl who messaged me did so because she thought I wrote for Business Standard (which I rarely do). So I gave dating another shot by switching to Woo, an app for urban Indians.

On launching Woo, I discovered a compass spinning like crazy over all the potential daters falling within its scope. Within seconds, I was flooded with pictures of women close to me in distance, tastes. However, I don't think I got so much as a phone number in the hours that went by.

My initial experience wasn't spectacular. The app sucked up my worst-looking pic from Facebook, and slapped it onto my dating profile. I wanted to paint a pretty picture of myself. But the app told me my Facebook account did not have more portraits to choose from. I had always thought it was easy to stretch the truth online. Everyone, including me, does that. But Woo makes it damn difficult, by cross-checking your details with Facebook and LinkedIn.

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So, Woo told me: swipe down to select, up to reject potential daters. I started getting a trickle of girls nearby, on the basis of shared interests, proximity. In fact, I got a regular trickle of eight to nine girls daily. The app seemed like Tinder, except that it had fewer girls.

I had a standard message for the ladies: "It's not often I get stopped in my tracks while looking through here. You have a great smile and beautiful eyes!" I copied and pasted that again and again, using the app's messaging service. It was just a template, and I would change the bit about the great smile and beautiful eyes if she were pouting and squinting, respectively. It didn't seem to work though.

I was still struggling to land matches through the app. So, I used it mostly for entertainment. Woo's anonymous programming sucked me in. It gave me useful cover while I read the profiles of women around me. Some were sincere; some stuck their tongues at me. But I loved them all.

One day, I got so emotional, I began mass-swiping everyone. When I ran out of girls to swipe, I got even more emotional, and increased the age limit for potential daters to maximum: 50 plus.

My emotions paid off. That day, I landed a match.I quickly browsed through her profile. She was an aunty - in her 50s, enigmatic smile, black-and-white portrait. The app showed that her interests were general enough, which was a relief. But the only thing we had in common was ... she was nice. She told me: "I am just looking to have a nice time with people I like."

We soon discovered we were only a few miles apart; we both loved Yo Yo Honey Singh, the rapper; and we both realised it was well past midnight. So, we wished good night. I never heard from her again.

Crestfallen, morose, and a couple of more matches later, I realised how Woo worked. New connections were constantly forming, and earlier ones dissolving. I felt my adventures on the app racing towards an end. I hadn't expected to find love, I hadn't been searching for it, I wasn't even sure I wanted it.

It's just that I had grown restless over the app. I felt an urge to see who had messaged me. I felt an urge to make conquests. And to chat away the night. My tip to you: There's really no downside getting into this app. Just avoid investing yourself too much in it, and there will be a potential for some great experiences.

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First Published: Jul 25 2015 | 12:03 AM IST

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