Later, I asked each of them, two of whom are very shy and retiring sort of men, why they had agreed to the "launch''. They said the publisher had harassed them to have one, to the point of molestation.
One of them, at least, had received a tidy advance, so I suppose it made sense for the publisher to try and promote the book. After all, the advance - or as much of it as possible - has to be recovered.
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Presumably, the same logic applies to all book launches. I say presumably because I don't think all writers whose books are "launched" receive advances. Some, I know, even refuse it.
Of the two friends I mentioned above one certainly didn't receive any advance. But the publisher still paid for the "launch" function - rent for the hall, tea, coffee, biscuits, sandwiches and pakodas.
Sometimes, according to my friends who go for these launches, the post-launch meal is classier with wine and cheese and canapes and so on. If you a real celebrity, it runs to a full dinner with scotch, which must surely cost a lot.
I have therefore developed a thumb-rule about advances: The costlier the post-launch feeding, the higher has been the advance. The reverse must also be true, I am sure.
The venue, too, is a dead giveaway. As you go down the ladder, you can even figure out whether it is the publisher or the author who has paid for the "launch".
Free food?
Do these book "launches" make any difference to sales beyond the 50 or so copies bought by people who feel obliged because they have enjoyed the hospitality? After all, Rs 500 - which is usually around what the books cost - for a meal with unlimited scotch is not a bad deal. Or even for unlimited tea, coffee, biscuits, sandwiches and pakodas, for that matter.
Sometimes, when the author is a super celebrity, and they have launches in five-star hotels in all large metros, copies sold might go to about 200. But beyond that do sales increase because of these "launches"? There can't be any way of knowing.
In any case, I imagine most people slide off without buying which is perfectly rational. It's like not tipping waiters: They will never remember that you didn't tip if you don't return soon.
Most people who go for book launches go for the free food and booze because, well, really, why else would you go and listen to someone discussing a book you have not read and in all likelihood will never read?
One way to check is to not offer any hospitality and see how many people attend. Very few, I suspect, even for celebrity writers.
Here I must share a dreadful secret. After one of the three launches that I attended, one of the "discussants" sheepishly told me he had not actually read the book and had winged it after hastily glancing through the flap matter in the car.
I wonder how many times this happens. Quite often, I am certain.
Then there is the problem of being honest. As a discussant, or even as an attendee, can you tell the gathering that it is a rotten book? Wouldn't that be like telling a bridegroom he looks a perfect idiot?
What, no reviews?
Strangely publishers and authors have lost sight of a vital aspect of book promotion: The well-written review. They prefer these "launches" instead and, possibly because the promotions budget is limited, send out far fewer copies for review than they used to even five years ago.
They also seem to think that a good review means an uncritical review, forgetting that there is a big difference between a review that pans the book - which is rare - and a review that actually critiques it properly. I do know that authors value such reviews far more than the bukbuk that went on at the three launches I attended.
Publishers also don't seem to have grasped that in today's digital world reviews have become invaluable because you can buy the book almost at once after reading the review. Intrigued by the review? Klik, klik, klik. Bought.
What you get instead are offers from PR firms to interview the author. But you know what? The author isn't the main thing? The main thing is the book.
Or isn't it?