AG Krishnamurthy: Grappling with peer pressure

AGKspeak/ Comparing rewards with others causes unhappiness

What I've liked

Things seem to be looking up! I've got a crop of three, pretty effective and nicely done ads to talk about this week. Crocin, Surf Excel Blue and the Samsung Exchange Offer. They all seem to have one thing in common "" all of them seem to have found a new way to say the same old thing. And the nicest part is they are all extremely identifiable. Simple, hardworking pieces of work with no large "This is Creative" stamp across it.

Haven't we all sat in cabs "counting the hairs on our head" hoping for some relief from the headache-ridden traffic, pollution and noise that fills our lives everyday? Placing a strip of Crocin in an enterprising cabbie's glove compartment might seem a stretch of the imagination for some but what a perfect place for a headache pill!

The Samsung copy-led ad too has the right mix of intrigue (to keep you wondering till the end) and relevance.

And as for the Surf ad, the husband's quick-witted repartee refusing to admit he was wrong, and then turning it around as a plug for the product's benefit was not only clever scripting but also a pretty good insight into human behaviour. And yes all they managed to tie all this quite neatly together to sell the detergent.

What I've learned

Growing with Grace

Ask any one who is blessed with more than the average share of blessings if he is happy and he is bound to say, "Not yet". He could be enjoying the car of his dreams, the home, the job title and even the family of his childhood dreams, but still his answer will carry shades of dissatisfaction and negativity.

As chairman and employer for over a quarter of a decade, I have learned that no matter how big a promotion or an increment is given, it is very rare that it is accepted with true joy. It is always 'not enough' or given 'too late'.

It is a pity that we deny ourselves the joy that could be so rightfully ours "" all the time. Let me illustrate with a little story. In recognition of one of my colleague's service, I invited him to join the Board of Directors. It was, I thought an apt recognition for a good performer.

He had performed consistently and ably over the years, so I thought it was just the right time to escalate his position within the company by having him on the Board. Expecting that he would be ple asantly surprised, I sent across a letter along with a silver thali as a gift.

Strangely, there was a silence for the entire day. I waited patiently a little while even during the course of the following day, and still the same silence. A little puzzled I called him to check whether he had received it at all. And he replied yes, but the recognition had come late!

In yet another incident, on the day the increments were announced, one of my colleagues rushed into my room, ecstatic about the raise she was given. The next day, I learned she had put in her papers. When I confronted her about it, she informed that she was extremely upset because her fellow colleague was given a much higher raise. Clearly it looked like her happiness was inversely proportionate to that of her neighbour's.

This, I think is the root of all unhappiness. We tend to weigh our state of mind with that of our peer group. Which is why we conclude that life gives us our rewards too late. Because we are always in a state of constant comparison. The ensuing mismatch results in a lot of unnecessary bitterness, resentment and unhappiness. Which is why very few of us grow with grace and dignity.

All we need is to stop weighing our rewards with those of our neighbour's. And suddenly grace and dignity "" the most admired attitudes of all "" will be ours for the asking.

Email : agkbrandconsult@yahoo.com