Don't fag, say the nags

@PERIPATETIC

I REMEMBER THE time when smokers would choose airlines based on whether they permitted lighting up or not. Over the 1990s that list kept dwindling until one day when there was not a single airline left that excused even a desperate fag.

By this time my mother-in-law, who has since given up smoking, was wringing her hands over a proposed trip from London to Melbourne, calculating how many stopovers she'd need to fit in to survive the forced abstinence.

Then, last year, a canny German entrepreneur announced the launch of Smintair, the world's first only-smokers' airline, promising a return to glory days. For all those who believed that was a publicity gimmick, the latest news is that the plan is to fly two leased Boeing 747s on the Duesseldorf-Tokyo route (the Japanese are notorious smokers) and has just received confirmed slots at both airports.

You have to commiserate with The Smoker. First it was airplanes, then restaurants and bars, then beaches, and now even hotel rooms. The Starwood and Marriott chains of hotels have already enforced smoking bans in their US and Canadian properties. Royal Carribean just became the first cruise ship operator to ban smoking in cabins.

Smoking bans have become a hot button issue all over it seems, and cities everywhere are pondering over the potential loss of millions in tourism dollars in the wake of these bans. (With some luck, some of that tourism might be directed towards India.) London was the most recent high-profile destination to boot out fag hags from public places.

At least the government was considerate. The ban was timed for summer (which ironically got washed out) and pub groups were investing in outdoor areas so smokers could step outside. Friends travelling to the city post-July 1 were all heard discussing the issue at length. "But you're not even a smoker," I said to one such friend. "But I think I might want to start just because I won't be allowed to," she snapped back.

Hawaii, that land of excessive indulgence, also recently implemented one of the strictest no-smoking laws amid great fears it may deter cigarette-puffing tourists from coming to the islands.

Top on their list of worries, according to media reports, were those high spending, Japanese and we all know how travel destinations fiercely compete for them and their dollars.

Hawaii, it seems, is working hard with Japanese travel wholesalers and agents to inform visitors, and airports are playing recorded greetings to inform travellers of the fineprint of the law.

Now if there's one city where smoking is tolerated despite bans, it is Paris. As long as smokers and non-smokers show "mutual respect", all is well. But in Paris, they always find other ways to mitigate their noxious pursuits.

They recently introduced Velib, a city-wide bicycle rental scheme. You simply pick up a bike from among 10,600 "" the figure is to be doubled by the end of the year "" at one of the several stands around the city, ride it along and drop it back at any random stand near your destination.

The first half-hour's pedal-time is free, with charges rising after, and the whole city "" office goers, midnight revellers and tourists included "" has taken to it with gusto. It does, for the time being, seem to be challenging the car fixation and Paris is threatening to reclaim streets for exclusive bicycling. Such a success has Velib been that Seoul and London are following suit.

So while smokers lament the fact that their worlds are getting smaller, let the rest of us raise our toasts to healthier holidays!