Sinner takes all

Cars that will land up in hell. Hope we're there to drive 'em.

The legendary seven deadly sins have been associated with the entire gamut of imagery and iconograhy.

Except the automobile. So we decided to do something about it. And here it is. The seven deadly sins and the cars that stand for them.

Envy
Ferrari F40
Every Ferrari in the world is the object of covetous glances. And of that select bunch of cars, the F40 is the one to have. Owning one will send people careening into hell along with a rapidly building avalanche of envy.

Why? Well, look at it. It's brutal and powerful. Like Beauty and Beast did indeed fall prey to Lust, post wedlock, of course.

To back up the come-hither, the F40 boasts a near-race-spec, 3000cc, 478 bhp, twin-turbo motor, in an almost-proper-race car chassis built with super-light composites. The fact that only 1,315 of these were made adds immeasurably to the pedigree of Beauty and Beasts's lineage. And to the envy quotient.

Gluttony
Dodge Ram SRT-10
Imagine a huge gaping mouth, perpetually open, waiting eternally to be filled, to chew and to swallow. No, don't go down there. The Dodge Ram SRT-10 is the automotive equivalent.

It consumes swimming pools of fuel in seconds, and the 8500cc V-10 of a stomach turns them instantly into gratuitous exhaust noise and tyre smoke. It panders unabashedly to refinery owners, who also (usually) happen to have abundant garage space (another resource the SRT, er... consumes with abandon).

If global warming ever needed a two-seater mascot, this fifteen-foot long land-yacht is it.

Greed
Rolls-Royce Phantom
If seeing is believing, this is the car to be seen in. It is the equivalent of flashing your bank statement, printed in Swarovski crystals on a two-inch thick plate of pure gold.

Yes, it's that obvious. Sit inside the Roller, and everyone outside will instantly hate you. You will automatically become the poster boy of greed and the favourite shoulder for all the other sinners on this list to cry on.

We were tempted to upstage the Roller as a symbol of greed with the hideous Maybach, but stopped short. You see, at some level, it does try to hide itself and look like a startled Korean luxo-car. The Phantom just looks rich, greedy, flashy and happy with itself. Unforgivable.

Sloth
Ford Edsel
No toilet seat ever made it as big as the one on the Ford Edsel. Or got flushed as quickly, for that matter. Leading from the front, the toilet seat suffered the abundantly decorated car's excuse of an engine.

In fact, apart from the novelty value of owning a car with a commode top on the grille, no one could come up with a reason to buy one. No wonder then, that Ed didn't Sell.

Purists say the restroom ornamentation wasn't why the Edsel flopped. The 4700cc, 200 bhp paper weight had a seventeen foot long, two ton body. And then they gave it just two doors to get in.

Wrath
Skyline GT-R R34
Ever been so angry that your face went red, your ears rang with the furious rushing about of your own blood, your veins stood out, the fists clenched and your voice was raised into a bellowing roar... yes, you get the picture don't you?

That is the Nissan Skyline GT-R R34. Tuned to within an inch of its life, this is a 'family sedan' after the family was brutally chainsawed. The car is very, very angry and ready to shed some serious blood. R34s routinely make 1000 bhp 2600cc motors so small, they could power Mini-motos.

After which they enter contests with supercars that usually leads to some expensive embarrassment on the Italian border.

Pride
SLR McLaren
One of the perspectives on pride is 'excessive love of self.' And we cannot see a more appropriate automobile to reflect yourself in. The SLR McLaren is gratuitously over the top and has enough electronics to keep the richest fools from becoming street furniture imprints, but at the end of the day it is just a hopped up SL that costs half a million dollars.

And there was a time when SL stood for Sport Licht? It does have a 626 bhp motor, but it's still a puppet, chained by millions of miles of silicon. Why?

So the owner can see his reflection and watch people watch him without having to worry about an extremely expensive road sign.

Lust
Lamborghini Miura
This is the sin that makes hell worth it. And the Lamborghini Miura is the car that gives this sin a reasonable basis for committing it. The world's first mid-engined car sported eyelashes, which it used to seduce and entrap.

Not content, the motor and the eyelashes were but an advertisement for its galaxy of talents. Like sublime handling, an evocative badge, a proper baritone singing voice and a body that's so lustful it makes selling your soul to the devil worth it.