One of the staples of the British comic troupe Monty Python was its sketch called The Ministry of Silly Walks and that was the first thing that came to mind when, at a Roman eatery last weekend, a fellow diner, a top level executive at a European luxury house, said, "What India needs is a Ministry of Marketing."
We had been discussing Europe's fine traditions of respecting and cherishing its history and heritage; how the smallest fort, the most unprepossessing craft or the slightest act of creation would be presented with such staggering finesse that it would assume a grandeur often far exceeding its original worth. In India, works of far more beauty and history hardly receive their due.
Those of us who write about luxury and lifestyle have experienced this up close. For instance, how a famous porcelain brand packages its product to the world, bringing to light the creativity, workmanship, history and significance of each phase in the product's life; how the makers of leather goods make each wallet, briefcase, or handbag that conveys decades of heritage; how growers of grapes and producers of wine imbue their produce with romance and glamour.
Why do you not do the same with all the beauty and history of India, I had been asked. Why cannot there be a Ministry of Marketing, an entity that gather under one roof the finest communicators, the best marketing geniuses, the most celebrated spin doctors and entrust to it Indian products to weave their magic around?
The humble Kohlapuri chappal, for example. Handmade and embodying strong values of tradition and design. Imagine how much a creative communicator could do with its story; imagine how the world would value it if it were presented for what it is - a work of art made by hand, with centuries of tradition in its sole.
Or the beautiful and ancient craft of weaving Patan Patolas, those unimaginably exquisite double ikat saris, each one requiring years of labour, and each a heritage stand-alone piece, original and one of its kind bearing the stamp of its weavers, often of an entire generation or family.
Or just something as simple and delicious as coconut water, the god-given elixir that we take so much for granted. What if it's making was given the same attention and the same story-telling as that of wine or champagne? How much more it would be appreciated, how much more it would be sought after.
The art of taking something and giving it a story, putting it in a context, affording it romance and glamour is, after all, what marketing is all about. Why have we, as a nation, been so lacking in it? Why are we so reluctant to learn how to showcase our history and produce to others?
In Rome, two leading luxury houses have turned their attention to restoring historic monuments of their city so that the synergy created can be used to add value to their business. I recall a similar attempt in India where the project was stymied by politicians and bureaucrats even before it got off the ground. "We wanted to restore the forts of Rajasthan," a Parisian businessman with interests in India had told me. "They were in such disrepair. A progressive chief minister had backed the idea. But the Opposition in the state came down like a tonne of bricks, alleging all kinds of vile agendas. Ultimately we backed off, and the forts continue to crumble."
A Ministry of Marketing, which takes all that is beautiful precious and valuable in India and tells its story. Not such a silly idea on second thought.