Cowboys vs Indians: Admit it, you care what the world thinks

Waiter, there's a cow in my everything

If I unexpectedly had five minutes of the government’s undivided attention — thoo, thoo, thoo — I would tell it just this one thing: Guys (if you will pardon the expression), the cow thing has gotten completely out of hand.
 
I don’t mean out of hand as in, how people are killing other people over cows. Nobody in the government cares about that. Nor do I mean how every cow is getting an Aadhaar number, though even lots of humans don’t want one — the government thinks that’s a good use of time and money. I don’t mean how